Spring Break 2014

I always feel so guilty when I don't blog for a while. Generally the reason is because not much has happened, so saving my (few) readers a detailed play-by-play of the mundane goings-on of my life is actually a favor ;) But the past week has actually been BUSY. Which means I have things to report on, but no time to actually report.

Last week I successfully completed two more training sessions (on Wednesday and Friday). I'm a fan of my trainer so far. She knows how far to push me without making me so sore that I can't sit on a toilet (which has happened before, and I pray never happens again. It's not pretty). The weight room was also far less crowded on Wednesday and Friday (hmmm... maybe men also subscribe to the whole "I'll start again on Monday" thing?), so it was much less embarrassing.

***Side Note*** Apologies to my parents for using the phrase "popped my weight room cherry" in my last post. Apparently they were horrified at my choice of descriptive language. ***End of Side Note***

Joe and I left on Saturday afternoon for our Spring Break trip to California. It's been nearly a year since I've been home to visit my family, so I was super excited. What I was not excited about, though, was leaving my poor baby:

I mean - seriously - who could leave this adorable face?!

Instead of boarding him at the vet (which is what we did the last, and only, time we left him), we hired another dental student to stay at our house and dog-sit Buster. It was actually comparably priced to boarding, and I hate the idea of putting a former shelter dog back in a shelter-like setting. Reports from Buster's sitter have been good so far - much less crying than we expected.

***Side Note*** The lack of crying was on Buster's end, as I bawled before the sitter got to our house on Saturday. I am a legitimate crazy person. ***End of Side Note***

Coming home has been such a surreal experience. It certainly does NOT feel like we have been gone for a year, and it makes me realize how quickly dental school has been passing. This is definitely a good thing, as I am ready to ditch this chapter of our lives. While I like Philadelphia and am proud of all that Joe is doing, I miss living by family and I want to feel more like a grown-up and less like a college student. While it's Joe doing the studying, we live on a college student budget. The shopper in me cannot stand that ;)

Speaking of chapters in our life, I lately have developed an obsession: reading every single fertility / pregnancy book I can get my hands on. To be clear, we are not currently trying. After all, we have the unlimited booze package booked for our cruise, so that would just be crazy ;) Also, D2 (the second year of dental school) is the most difficult, so having a newborn during D2 would be pretty ambitious.  But, I am nothing if not a planner, so I am devouring everything I can in prep for baby-making and baby-growing.

To be honest, it is terrifying me.

But I can't stop.

I really had no idea that pregnancy was so horrific. I knew you got fat. I knew your boobs ached. I knew morning sickness existed. Little did I know that these things barely scratch the surface of the ailments a poor pregnant lady must endure.

Of course, it will all be worth it.

But WOW.

While there is more to say about the trip, I am exhausted and now I feel a little sick thinking about my not-too-distant future. Time to get back to my latest pregnancy book and hope that this one is a bit more positive ;)

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Sore Tuesday

Forget Fat Tuesday; today is Sore Tuesday.

There was no way that after busting my butt in the gym yesterday I was going to overindulge today - despite the built-in excuse ;) I was actually surprised that I wasn't in more pain, because I legitimately thought there was a chance I was going to barf, pass out, or die during my first official workout yesterday. But none of the above happened, so I consider that a HUGE win.

I DID Jillian, I swear!

I can't imagine how embarrassing it would have been if I actually puked or passed out. Heck, it was already an embarrassing experience because I had to train in the men's training area.

***Side Note*** By "men's training area,"I mean the co-ed free weight room that few women dare step foot in, either because they don't know what to do, are afraid of getting hit on, or don't want to "bulk up" (which is stupid, because weight-training is so important in slimming down). ***End of Side Note***

Instead of easing me into the "man zone," my trainer popped my weight room cherry by making me do lunges the entire length of the room and back. Twice.

I was SO MORTIFIED.

Not only have I just recently been re-taught how to lunge (I apparently forgot every single thing my trainer 5 years ago taught me), but my balance is terrible, and my endurance is pathetic.

This led to me huffing and puffing down the length of the room and probably appearing half-drunk. All the men watched, of course.

I WANTED TO DIE.

I told myself then and am trying to tell myself now that maybe they admired my moxie? After all, I was obviously out of my comfort zone and I was pushing through. But they probably were thinking, "What is this chubby chick doing? I really hope she doesn't have a heart attack. I have more reps to do and a crew of EMTs would disrupt that."

Tomorrow I get to go back and do the whole thing all over again. I am so not looking forward to it. But I keep browsing the internet for cruise clothes and I really, really want to feel more comfortable with my body before that trip. So I shall press on.

Only 35 more sessions left ;)

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It's Official - I'm Going to Hate Myself

I did it! Yesterday I signed up for 36 pre-paid sessions with a trainer (3x a week for 3 months) and we did an assessment workout.

My assessment is that I am going to HATE myself. I am really glad that I bit the bullet and made that commitment, but there are going to be MANY, MANY times when I will surely question my sanity for subjecting myself to this torture - especially 36 promised sessions of torture.

I've already felt twinges of regret. They come, for example, every time I use the stairs and my butt feels like someone is going to town with a chisel on each cheek.

But, in the end, I'd rather hate myself for pushing myself than hate myself for being lazy and taking no action whatsoever.

I think it is pretty clear from my yo-yo dieting and constant vows of "I will improve" and "this time will be different," that I am currently incapable of committing to changing my body on my own. I'm furious at myself that my health and my desire to look better isn't motivation enough, but I  clearly need something more.

Maybe feeling accountable to my trainer will help give me the added push I need (after all, I am a people pleaser). Maybe knowing how disgusted I'd feel with myself if I wasted this money will do it. Maybe the very fact that I bet this large sum of money on myself will empower me and I'll switch into kick-butt mode.

Whatever the case, I truly believe that I will be better off once these 36 sessions are complete. It's just up to me how much better off I'll be. And I know that I'll be mad at myself mid-workout when I am exhausted and in pain, but I know it'll be worth it.

I may just have to avoid stairs as much as possible for the next 3 months. I wonder how Joe would feel about moving our bed downstairs to the living room ;)

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Weigh-in Wednesday

I am FINALLY the lowest I have been in 2014:

It's taken me nearly a month to make up for my two weeks of sloth and gluttony following my toe incident, but here I am :) In two months I am officially down 6.8 pounds.

I have also made two big decisions with regards to my weight loss.

The first decision was to rejigger my points and to make 2500 the goal before the cruise instead of 3000.

***Side Note*** For anyone new to the blog, here's where I explain my point system. The big prize I get for hitting my points is new clothes for our June cruise. ***End of Side Note***

I feel a little like I've cheated, but there is ZERO way that I was going to be able to attain the 3000 points. So it's either abandon the points all together, or re-evaluate them. Afraid that I was justifying something that shouldn't be justified (after all, this WAS an attainable goal when I first set it), I talked to Joe. He pointed out that Paparazzi has been taking up such a HUGE amount of time, that when I predicted my point-earning ability per day I had no idea that I was essentially going to be working a full time AND and half time job. There are also things that I've dropped earning points for (like going to church, since I felt wrong giving myself points for that), and I didn't adjust my original goal to reflect those changes.

So 2500 points it is - and according to Joe I am NOT allowed to change this again. No new clothes if I don't hit it. Given that I've been doing some online perusing of cute outfits lately, I refuse to let that happen.

Just a little inspiration courtesy of ModCloth.

Also, since I shouldn't be let entirely off the hook, I've eliminated my mini-rewards. I figure a new cruise wardrobe is motivation (and expensive) enough, and it's not fair that I get everything I promised myself when I haven't fully committed myself.

My other big change is that I have decided to hire a personal trainer. I had a trainer for several months about 5 years ago, and it really kept me consistent with going to the gym. I couldn't just back out because I didn't feel like going. I was also able to push myself a lot more, especially with weights, because I trusted he knew that what he was asking me to do was possible.

Yesterday while I was half-assedly using the elliptical machine and thinking of all the cute clothes I wanted to buy for the cruise, I realized that even if I earn the points to get the clothes - who says I'll actually look good in them. To-date, I've earned nearly 1000 points and lost 6.8 pounds. With only 1500 more points to go, if I lose at the same rate I won't even hit a total of 20 pounds lost before the cruise. 

Not cool.

My ability to hire a trainer is twofold:

a.) Trainers are surprisingly cheap in Philly.  The cost is about half of what it would have been to have a trainer in San Francisco.

b.) My job pays based on output and I am able to work as much as I want. This means I have the unique opportunity to "pay" for extras just by working extra hours. While it stinks to increase my workload even more, I feel like I would be a fool to turn down what I am viewing as free training (since our monthly income vs. expenses will work out to the same thing). 

So today I go in for my free consultation (30 minutes of goal-planning, 30 minute training session) and I'm going to just bite the bullet and officially sign up.

I planned to wait until after I got back from California to start training, but the last thing I want is to go into vacation-mode early and start eating bad in anticipation of the fact that I won't be eating the best while I am there (I ALWAYS do that). Plus, knowing I have someone who I will be accountable to when I return may mean that I am able to be more disciplined while I am gone. 

Wish me luck! I am sure to need it today.

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Busy, busy, busy

Wow - my blogging has been pretty nonexistent lately. Apologies for that. There hasn't been much going on in the Brier household the last 5 or so weeks. Joe is swamped with school, and I am swamped with work and Paparazzi stuff. While I am thrilled that it's taken off as it has (I have online parties booked every night for the next 8 nights - only stopping because I leave for 10 days in California after that), I have been running myself ragged trying to work my real job and trying to keep up with all the demands of this jewelry business.

Last week I had parties on 4 nights - it takes me about 2 hours per night (1 for the party, 1 for prepping/wrapping up), so that is 8 hours. Then, it took me about an hour to invoice, 2 hours to sort all the jewelry, and 5 hours to pack all the packages. The post office trips (I had to do 2 so far) added up to about 1 1/2 hours (darn those lines). I also had to prep marketing materials for the parties, which I probably spent another 1 1/2 hours on. So that means I spent about 19-20 hours last week on those two Paparazzi parties. Based on what I sold, I probably made about $280, so that means that this part-time job paid out around $14 an hour.

Honestly - not bad.

I'm actually happy I took the time to calculate that since I've been pretty frustrated with how time consuming it's been - haha. But when I have a full-time job already, devoting 20+ hours a week to a hobby is just not something I am going to be able to keep up.

How true this is haha

Frankly, the reason I started Paparazzi in the first place is because I was hoping it could evolve into a big enough moneymaker that when I needed to look for another job (since mine is a contract position), we'd have a cushion (since Philly's job market SUCKS). Deep down, I dreamed it could get big enough that I could do Paparazzi full-time and not have to find something else.

I'm seeing now that is actually a real possibility. The only catch is that my contract job is going really well, and it sounds like it's going to last a lot longer than I expected.

So now I need to make some serious decisions about how I want to proceed. I think what makes obvious sense is to cut way back on the parties once I get home from California next month. I'll probably just do one a week (instead of the 2-3 that I have been doing lately). It really stinks because I enjoy doing it, but my real job pays based on output. If I have extra time on my hands, it makes financial sense to do more of my actual job than to do jewelry parties.

Once that job is finished, I'll be able to ramp the jewelry biz back up :)

***Side Note*** And, by the way, don't get me wrong - I absolutely see the blessing in being busy because of work. It took a long time for me to find a job when we moved to Philadelphia, and I am so grateful that I am able to support my little family. I am especially grateful that this job is SO AMAZING - I truly could not ask for anything better. That said, were it not for Paparazzi, I'm sure I'd be bored out of my mind and have too much time on my hands. So I just need a happy medium. ***End of Side Note***

Alright - so it's settled. I have a plan moving forward!

I guess blogs can be therapeutic ;) it's nice to have a place to get my thoughts out... sorry you were along for this ride. I'm sure this didn't make the most entertaining post ;) But when all I've been doing and thinking about for the last 5 weeks is jewelry and work, you can't expect anything too exciting from me.

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Weigh-In Wednesday... A Little Late

I'm late with Weigh-In Wednesday again, but at least I did it :) I was a little afraid of my weight this week because of our HUGE Valentine's dinner. BUT I was down! Woot Woot!

I am officially down 5.6 pounds since the beginning of January. I'm still making up for those pounds I gained while nursing my broken toe (with wine and food, of course) a couple weeks ago, but 5.6 pounds is not too shabby. That's a 1.8 pound drop from last week.

Today I FINALLY got my butt back to the gym and did a 40 minute workout. I even walked there and back, which allowed me to log 60 total "exercise" minutes. I definitely needed those points. I'm still on track to earn my new cruise clothes, but I need to work a lot harder than I have been.

Anyways, it's late, I'm exhausted, and the number of things I have to do tomorrow is psyching me out pretty bad. I hope to blog more soon :)

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Valentine's Day 2014

Happy (belated) Valentine's Day everyone!

This year, as usual, Joe and I vetoed gifts in favor of going out to a fancy dinner. We also do this for our anniversary. We figure it's hard enough to think of gifts for birthdays and Christmases, why rack our brains for two more dates on the calendar? Plus, we have too much stuff as it is. What we don't have a lot of (especially now) is time with each other.

Since Valentine's Day was on a Friday this year, we decided to do our fancy dinner on Saturday and hang out at home on Friday night. Why brave the crowds? Especially when season 2 of House of Cards had a 2/14 start-date ;)

So Joe made heart-shaped pizza and we chilled on the couch watching House of Cards. It was SO relaxing - which was something both of us desperately needed.

For our fancy dinner on Saturday, Joe made reservations at a northern Italian steakhouse. MMMMM.

I was super pumped because I figured out how to do a sock bun in my hair. My hair NEVER EVER EVER cooperates. I could spray tons and tons and tons of hairspray in my hair and it still doesn't hold. I had pretty much given up on ever being able to have my hair in any sort of "do" - until I learned of the sock bun.

We got to the restaurant a little early, so we had some pre-dinner drinks. I accidentally ordered a $17 glass of wine. Oops...

I'm trying to grow out my bangs... they are in a super awkward stage...

Dinner was DELICIOUS.

We started off with Philly cheesesteak spring rolls - which were yummy:

We also had salads (no pics) and for dinner Joe had the flat iron steak and I had a 12 ounce filet mignon. I should have ordered the 8, but it's been way too long since I had steak - I couldn't turn down an extra 4 ounces ;) For sides, we had gnocchi with pomodoro sauce and mac-n-cheese with truffle oil. Oh-so-fancy!

Of course, we had to get dessert too. A chocolate molten soufflé with vanilla gelato:

We definitely want to go back when my parents visit. Though it was pretty pricey, they have free corkage on Sunday nights and if we could bring our own wine that would cut down the tab a lot.

When we got home, Joe suggested that we watch Dirty Dancing. He knows I love it and he had never seen it before. It was really fun and during the last dancing scene we started dancing around the living room (cheesy, but what-ev).

Then we both went to bed at about 10:30. I think we are getting old haha.

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